Stop Abusing Me!

The purpose of this site is turn up the awareness in the community on the subject of child abuse, as it is a major communal concern. I will do my best to deliver valuable and accurate information on the subject. I also take very seriously the painstaking task of being a spokesman for the children who need to be heard. I feel as a child formerly from an abusive home, it is my obligation to inform you of the tiny voices that are overlooked!

2.10.2006

A Lesson a Day, Keeps Hypocrisy Away....














Another day's lessons to be learned:


Children are a joy to be treasured and grasped.....
Children are people, reminding us of the past.
Children are joyous, and painful as well......
Children are a secret, with a story to tell.
Children are persistent, as young people do......
Children do the same things, WE used to do.
Children are leaders, in their own natural way......
Children, WE think, have TOO much to say.
Children have voices, that NEED to be heard......
Children have answer's, that WE still have'nt learned.
Children are a vision, or SO they SHOULD be......
The POWER of their lesson, lies within YOU and ME.
Children learn by lesson, and lesson alone......
Children cannot LEARN, ALL ON THEIR OWN!!

--------Kimberlee R. Williams 2006
(personal reflection of childhood memories)

1.10.2006

The Calming After the STORM

Sometimes violence doesn't lie within harsh words and acts of violence, sometimes the worst of the perpetration is committed by silence or by DEADLY emotional detriment! Even sometimes the worst abuse goes on undetected, I have another story for you. I have recently divorced, I know that many of the readers and contributors to my blog, have added comments about how lucky of a man my husband is, how lucky we are as a family, the truth is that sometimes families aren't whole like society expects them to be. An ideal family picture is mother, father, and 2 1/2 children, well in MY almost perfect picture, its me, and 8 children, a cat, a dog, a rabbit and an idea to raise children as children. I divorced my husband for reasons that are crazy to some and sane to others. My husband was financially abusive and he was and STILL IS, a bully! Whenever he had his eye on something that costed money, (i.e. video game, car, clothes shoes...) he would admire and plot within. Everytime things are going great, he would screw it up by taking money from us, and DISAPPEAR!! He would wait til things were so bad at home, (bills backed up, second notices, shut-off notices or time-sensitive deadlines...) and leave. One year, he was a new student @ M.C.T.C., my Mother had recently passed away, and we were trying to move into a house, he suggested that he take out a school loan to help pay for damage deposit, and kids school clothes, and catch up on bills,(it was august 2003). He told me to have the kids ready by 3:00 p.m. (Thursday, Sept.4th) when he get back we will go see the new landlord and take a cab shopping. 3:00...4:00...5:00...7:30...9:30 came and I gave up! Come to find out, he skipped class, cashed his check ($3,978.00) bought a LINCOLN CONTINENTAL and drove back home to Joliet, Illinois. I had no food, 2 diapers and 3 days later, was my birthday! (We celebrated my birthday in the dark that weekend cuz they cut off the electricity the Friday before) ...and of course I hustled, BY MYSELF, and got the bill paid(Catholic Charities) , the food situation resolved (food shelves), diapers (Church) and the damage deposit, well that's another story. I will tell you that MY higher power (GOD) is good!! He is ALWAYS THERE AND RIGHT ON TIME!!! I moved into that house, with the good will of strong people behind me and determination to never let my family be homeless again! I recently paid off my damage deposit myself because I trusted that there was a lesson to be learned, and I empowered myself to be independent but with limitations. NOONE can do it by themselves! And WE are our children's greatest teachers! They learn their most important and valuable lessons at home. From us and THAT'S WHERE ABUSE IS ESSENTIAL TO ELIMINATE AS AN OPTION!!! It is not their fault that we go through what we go through, what the lesson to be learned in this instance is that how we as adults handle it, better prepare our children to handle the same situation in their life. Children learn by example and example only, no matter how much hot air you blow, if you are not backing it up with your strength and actions, you are every bit as a liar and an abuser as the original perpetrator!! The lesson that I drew from the marriage was that yes, there are more children involved, BUT that doesn't mean that I CANNOT do it. I am able!! Just because we think we know what is good for us does not mean that we are right!! I am o.k. with my children and we are a family. We as adults don't have to co-habitate to be effective parents and sometimes the best parenting is when one realizes that the other isn't being a productive influence in their own children's lives!! God bless us and you all and I will be back soon!
Peace and Blessings to you all,
Kimberlee

10.01.2005

Been a minute...But I'm back in the game

I have been handling a few things since I last blogged. I campaigned and got rid of that crazy neighbor. The Police forced her landlord to evict her, she was found to be a 'public nuisance' and I stayed committed until she was gone;) I had to do some housecleaning as well guys, attitudes around my house weren't that of beneficiary circumstances, so the Husband's gone too!!! (outta there) Now this semester for school, I am targeting a B honor roll status, I am collecting letters of recommendation, and summarizing a business plan. I am still making business contacts and potential endorsements, so whoever was the wise guy that responded "you're living in a fantasy world if you think kids are going to learn respect and boundaries" YOU ARE THE ONE who is perpetuating the abuse in THESE circumstances, see here? Because the people or 'circle' that I identify and associate with are the type that perpetuate hope and help! You are the one who is for a lack of better words 'FUCKED UP' and with that I will send out a prayer of hope in your glim little world and hope that one day YOU will meet your destiny and may it be with children!!! I am taking business law this semester, business management, and speech and communications. I am thinking of next semester when I take 'HTML' I am going to create a web page for my business plan, so those of you that have been loyal and checking out my page, please remain patient, the best is yet to come!

5.09.2005

Follow Through

Follow through is a very important measure of security for a child. If you say your going to do something, DO IT! If you dont, these are the reprecussions;

  • lack of trust
  • dishonesty
  • lying
  • stealing
  • drug usage
  • and increasing high school dropout rate

Understanding is another thing you need to utilize when handling a youngster, the lack of understanding causes reprocussions such as;

  • a sense of embarrassment
  • low self-esteem
  • feeling like an introvert
  • grade-failure
  • social decline
  • sense of worthlessness
  • acts of animal cruelty
  • self mutilation
  • and sooner or later, attempts of suicide

    Dishonesty,is the direct result in lying to a child!


The instant reaction to dishonesty is straight anger, and as a reprocussion the child projects;

  • verbal abuse
  • spiritual abuse
  • issues of anger
  • uncontrollable urges
  • serial like offensive type behavior
  • relationship abuse issues
  • dishonesty issues

Would'nt it be neat if life told us, "If you... then ....will happen" well life does tell you, I am life, and I am telling you.

"BEHOLD THE LIFE IN OUR YOUNG!"

4.24.2005

More Help is Needed

Here I go helping someone again, as if I didn't have enough work cut out for myself. My children, in case I never shared with you are not all by the same man. My Husband is the Father of my last 3, and he adopted the rest, now THAT'S a man. My first three have the same Father, my middle two each have their own and then my Husband's daughter (who doesn't live with us but we are as active as can be in her life) totals 9! My first three children's Father has another child, an 11 yr. old girl, and she is in his custody. He has some issues that we will not elaborate on, however, they are issues that are abusive in nature and need to be addressed. The father (38 yrs. Old) also lives with his Mother who is not of the greatest health, who needs help herself and cannot fully obtain that help from the son. Sort of like the 'blind leading the blind', no disrespect intended. The Father, (who isn't even the primary caretaker, the Grandmother is) has a lot in common with the birth mother, (both have habits that are hard to break) and the child is just 'assed out' all the way around the table! Whenever the child comes to visit ,(which is as often as we can keep tabs on her being that she is constantly back and forth between dysfunctional situations) she asks the neverending question, "when can I come and live with you?" My reluctance has been that of the Mother pulling some devious act ( She has 4 children. 1 is in the legal custody of his Father in Louisiana, 1 she gave up for adoption, 1 she just recently gave birth to who was born drug addicted, and then the subject)and then I would be in an uncomfortable position or better yet, the CHILD would be subjected to discomfort. Enough is enough, we have an 11 year old female that knows something aint right and she recognizes a difference in rearing. This is a young lady who could very well learn her puberescent lessons by trial and error OR by teaching, talking and sharing (doesn't every kid deserve a healthy environment?). I don't know if I am really in a position to take on the responsibility, however, I cant keep turning away. My husband and I discussed it 2 yrs ago and here we are discussing it again, the answer hasn't changed it has always been yes, the situations just aren't working themselves out like people keep assuming will happen. This is a true example of all the questions that arise when asking "when do I intervene?" A task lies before us, my family that is, that everyone else sits back and says, "I'm glad that isn't on me!" (In a way that isn't true, because now the lessons that she has learned, and the bad habits that she's acquired along the way, are coming to YOUR neighborhood! So now it is evident that the community has a responsibility as well as 'us', to helping this kid to learn a better way of life.) Yet it is a situation that needs to be handled and NOT lightly as it has already been! You may find some relief in knowing that ALL the adults (Father, Fraternal Grandmother, Mother, 3 Aunties, 6 Uncles, Myself and MY HUSBAND (Bless his heart!) have all discussed it and she will be coming to join our home after school is released! I will make sure to update you occasionally as to the healing of this situation continues. I do believe that God would not send more my way than can be handled and "He gave me a heart that was GREATER THAN GOLD!!! "
Peace be with you All!

4.19.2005

Check This Out

In the event of emerging from denial, and even going so far as to recognize the symptoms of abuse there are certain channels that you can venture through in the event of recovery. I as a former child of abuse am here to tell you that it is a difficult time when you are in realization. Realization that things are not what you have learned they are. People do give compliments and do do beautiful acts of kindness. There are people that do have a heart and a conscience and the world is not limited to the little "box" that so many victims become accustomed to living in. It is with a mighty voice that I am hear to tell you that a victim is not deserving of the defeat that is cast upon them, defeat is not in our vocabulary. Only VICTORY will prevail and I am responsible for the children in my community to make sure that the negative exposure stops here. I will take a stand and I will accept responsibility for my neighbors actions. I will take it upon myself to voice the lesson from within! Walk with me while we make a change together! Hold my hand, no, hold MY CHILD'S hand, and walk together in peace and tranquility!

4.13.2005

CREATIVITY!!!!!

If any kids are surfing through my sight, you can link on the titlebar and it will take you to the codes page. You can use these codes and make your own blogpage OR you can make a webpage on www.blackplanet.com. For all the things that society has taken away from our children, here is something safe and fun that you can do and there's no limit to your imagination. If you have any troubles creating what you need, you can AIM me (if I'm online) mommamia651 is my buddy name OR you can e-mail me at kydzinc@f-m.fm . Check with me and I can hook you up with backgrounds and with novelty display items. A lot of you kids already know about this feature because of Blackplanet.com, but, there are plenty of you that aren't familiar with the site and just want to have some good old-fashioned original fun! Good Luck to you my small friends and please know that somebody out here loves you!!!ME!
...And Jesus does too!

4.08.2005

Recognize the Pattern....

Recognition is the first stage in recovery if you are a victim of child abuse. The problem is that recognition isn't often available UNTIL you are an adult. When entering adulthood, it is vital and necessary to obtain the tools you need to having a vibrant and productive adult life, however, not all of us are equipped with the tools necessary to act as such. Broaden your horizons while in your teenage years. Spectate. Observe. Watch. Oversee situations at the park, in stores and in your classroom settings. There are a lot of telltale signs that can be recognized and modified if you are in tune to your environment. For example (high school), if you see your classmate in the office with their Parent, you noticed their deep in conversation and the classmate is looking down at the ground, has an I don't give a shit look on their face, is backtalking and being mouthy, and the Parent is cursing at the child...You have witnessed an intrusion of boundaries, several levels of disrespect, emotional abuse, no resolution has been set and more than likely, expectations that cant be understandably met are set and demanded for the child. When my children have a problem at school (high school), I gather information from my child (that's how I determine who needs to be involved), I call the school and ask that all parties involved be available for a meeting and then I observe while my child is able to communicate her/his relevant feelings and observations to the matters at hand. I encourage my child to respectfully state how she/he has viewed things (ALL HUMANS feelings are valid) and how she/he was affected. I listen to all the other points of view, and I try to advocate a compromise on the situation if necessary, at the same time validating to others that children's feelings are valid (although fleeting and unstable at times) and that ALL CHILDREN pass through the unstable stage of puberty at one time or another (we've all been there) sometimes we as adults have a hard time remembering/understanding that part, sometimes because of our own dysfunction. It is also very helpful for a Teacher to observe the level of involvement that a Parent has with their child (often times these children are not having the same family background as others, which causes a great Blockade in communication because they are not equipped with the rational way of coping) then that way they don't have to catergorize your child (it is unfair, YET, realistic) and know that there is a respectable way that situations can be resolved. If anything, my hopes are that I can widen the narrowminded, equip the unequipped, and enlighten the already knowing so that WE AS A COMMUNITY can take responsibility. I keep reminding the COMMUNITY of it's responsibilities because, if I don't, WHO WILL?!?!

4.07.2005

ENOUGH WITH THE EXCUSES...

Monday, February 14, 2005
Amidst cries of 'there aren't enough of us to go around!' and 'we have to consider the trauma of removal from the family!' the children of Michigan are being abused and dying because their safety is not being put first. Even when investigators arrive before tragedy -- they are letting the opportunity to save children pass by. From this morning's Detroit News:Steven Yager, director of the FIA's Office of Family Advocate, stressed removal of children is a difficult decision for workers, judges and the courts because it, too, can traumatize children."It causes workers to lose sleep," Yager said. "Removal is always traumatic. We have to weigh the trauma of the removal versus the risk of harm to that child."In one recent case, an Orion Township woman was charged with murder in the Dec. 20 scalding death of her boyfriend's 22-month old daughter, Jasmine Lawrence Phillips -- only eight days after an FIA case worker was at the couple's apartment investigating the suspected abuse of another child by the father.Letitia Johnson, 27, who is pregnant and has six children, and Louie D. Phillips have been investigated by the FIA for at least six abuse and neglect complaints of children dating to 1998. Yet none of the incidents was apparently serious enough to warrant actions or removal of children. Investigators say she deliberately held Jasmine in 147-degree water because she resented the infant and the infant's mother interfering with her relationship with Louie Phillips."I didn't know they (FAA) had been out there just a few days earlier," said Camilla Lawrence, the baby's mother. The article details other shocking cases where the FAA should have, and could have intervened and didn't -- including a case where the mother of children ages 7 and 4 was jailed for crack cocaine, and the children were left home with no care during her incarceration not just once, but twice. Oakland County in Michigan has the money needed to put it's children first, especially when there is money in the budget for special task force helicopters to search the yards of homes for pot plants. I'd like to see this State get it's priorities straight, just once.

Hold Hands, Take a Stand!

There is no reason why we as a community cannot be open and get honest about the reality of child abuse. If you don't FACE it you are in DENIAL! Denial creates over 30 different patterns of negativity in one's lifestyle, such as, lying, cheating, stealing, sneaking, deception, low self-esteem, low standard of living, and so on. There are more details that come with denial and the mind plays a lot of games when trying to disguise it's ugly face of denial. Our conscience is a trip, however if you take a hold to your spirit, cleanse it and make right what has been wronged by moving forward and living in prosperous manner, you build a stronger ground for yourself AND your community.

4.04.2005

Part #1 of the Crusade....






When I started the blogging on Child Abuse, I never anticipated being so involved that I would get as personal as to include instances from my own personal experiences. However, there is no better way to delegate help rather than from a victim/survivor of the crime. Would you rather hear advice from a person who has had first hand experiences in numerous situations and life events and has had a successful recovery and is able to pass on the knowledge and wisdom of abuse recovery? Or...would you rather hear advice from some pencil pushing individual that has never seen a struggling moment, a food stamp, heard a cussword, and doesn't have a clue of what a Dysfunctional Family consists of? *Remember to have UNDERSTANDING, you must walk in the shoes, otherwise you can only have EMPATHY! My guess is that you would rather take advice from someone who's 'been there, and done that.' I know that there are a lot more survivors out there who need to take an inventory of their own personal history, check themselves, get honest and band together as well, or this uphill battle will never come to a END. It is up to us as a community to take the initiative and declare responsibility for the children that we ARE responsible for, AND for the children who have not been equipped with the proper tools that it takes to develop into a normal positive and supportive adult member of the community. Peace be with YOU ALL!

Why Cant We All Just Get Along?????

It is with a heavy heart that I have to use a recent incident in an ongoing neighbor dispute involving child abuse of one's own house (neighbor) and the abuse they display on OTHER people's children (our home) for a reality check for all. I have a neighbor that I have a restraining order against, (we'll call her "J") and this is the most dynamic example of child abuse that I can relay to you as a grounds for intervention.
Last school year (2003), my son (10 y.o.) befriended a new neighbor's children from school ("R"&"J") and brought them home (1 by 1)and asked if (t)he(y) could come over to our house. I told my son 'No problem, tell them I want to meet their mother so that she knows where her son's are.' "R" let my son know that his mother wasn't home (which this ends up becoming more often) that she didn't care if he/they were there. I let "R" know that I would like to meet HIS mother soon so that I may possibly let my son come to their home as well. 3 or 4 days later, I saw the young man "R" and his mother walking down our block, so I introduced myself to her. I was left with the impression that she was a decent woman (which changed VERY soon after), she was somewhat jovial and humorous and I thought that it MIGHT be o.k.. Over the course of approx. 3 months (Sept. 03- Nov. 03) I witnessed some very scary methods of mothering that were outright abusive and that she was a very sinister character (kind of like Dr. Jekyll & Mr. Hyde.) On one afternoon in beginning December(03), I came out of my house just in time to see her hit her 3 children's father (3 have 1, 2 have 1, and 2 others have 1)over the head with a shovel as he was exiting her house. "J" called me to brag about the incident and admitted that he did nothing that she just likes making him 'miserable', she started describing to me very detailed accounts of her vandalizing his car on NUMEROUS occasions and other destructive behaviors she has displayed as well as used her kids in ploys of revenge or retaliation. Over the three month course of Sept.-Nov. I watched "J" manipulate people using her kids as pawns, and be malicious as well as a very negative influence over her children. I stopped my child from going down to her house any longer, however, her sons "R" & "J"(1 is approx.9 and 1 is approx.10) that had befriended my son, were still welcome at MY house (we operate differently in our home) afterall, I wasn't trying to separate the friendship, I was trying to assist in developing a more positive one. Those boy's loved it at our home "J" more than "R", often times 3-5 of the children would be at our house through the winter from time to time because when the children would come home from school in the cold, they would be locked out (later I find out after the kids trust me that she is at the bar often and simply just too drunk and forgot about her kids or the time.) Another white flag was when I took her to her mother's house and when she was out of the living room for a few moments, her mother asked me "where is that bitch "J" ", I said "upstairs" and she said "probably fu*king with someone, she's always starting trouble" at that precise moment, I knew that something was WAY WRONG! By her mother's own admission, she was a troublemaker and her own flesh and blood mother called her such a vulgar name, I WANT OUT!!! that's all I could keep saying, I have to leave this woman alone. I cut this woman off as of December 28th. and since then I have lost 2 vehicles, suffered broken house windows, flooded basement (she turned the hose on in our house while we were asleep), burglarized my vehicle, vandalized my vehicle by keying it, ripping off windshield wipers, rearview mirrors, and license plates and so much more AND the Police have been called close to over 100 times and she has FALSELY named my children as suspects in crimes that they HAVE NOT committed ("J" knows that my children don't have records and aren't troublemakers, that's something she let me know she was very envious over a while back). I'm subjected to public humiliation no matter what store I go to if she or her family member's are there AND if we as a family or any of the kids go outside, there's trouble, for example she hollers obscenities at us, calls me & MY CHILDREN racially slurred names, spreads personal and harmful rumors to our neighbors about us, throws garbage in our yard, dumps clothes on our property, visiting adults that frequent her house somehow ends up partaking a role in this juvenile, immature and condescending behavior, somehow, I have ended up with enemies that I don't even know, or what their faces look like until I'm being cussed out at a store or when they ride past our home! She take pix of our family members and GUESTS and SHE STILL come to our home UNWANTED even WITH a RESTRAINING ORDER. There has been physical confrontations (adults fist fighting), trespassing on her behalf, violation of CIVIL RIGHTS on our behalf and numerous other incidents. This past Thursday (3-31-05) a child was sent to the HOSPITAL in serious but stable condition and now the threat of GUNFIRE has been SUGGESTED. A simple act of a Mother trying to be a healthy and active parent, has turned into 1 1/2 yrs. of mental stress, rearranged a whole family's way of living, acts of violence have been perpetrated upon us, mass destruction of rental property and a once quiet neighborhood has been turned upside down because of another so called "adult's" lack of self control. Is this a case for abuse or what? PLEASE COMMENT!!!

3.28.2005

Emotion's Run Deep

One thing I know, as an abused child/adult, is that the behavior that the child develops in an abusive household is formed and practiced forever. The tools that need to be implemented are turned to defensive mechanisms and used in a negatively projected way. For instance, Jonnie comes from a two parent stable environment where both parents have jobs, 2 vehicles and a home. Jacob comes from a single parent (mother only) household where mom gets some public assistance (because she does'nt have the extra income). She's got NO men available to help lead the boy into manhood. Now, one could argue that the unfortunate situation of the lack of men IS THE REASON why the child is aggressive and rebelious, BUT, that is not the case here. See, Mom's so angry from being abandoned by Dad that she projects alot of anger at the child... "Your Dad is a deadbeat bastard," "Men are so lazy, I swear," "I cant wait til you get out, you eat too much of my damned food," "If you dont take out the garbage, dont eat my food," "You cant do sh*t right, can you?" "Nobody's going to want a fat as* kid like you, you better lose 20 lbs. by summer or you're not going to the beach with me." While reading this if your face got hot, or red or you felt ANGER, your right on with me, hold tight. Now, WHAT do you think that child does with all of that baggage that was unloaded on him in just one rampage? He internalizes it. He goes every little detail of what was said and either contributes to that way of thinking OR disects every piece of it and uncontrollably tries to please Mom by self correcting these instances and tries to be the "Perfect Child" making an impossible task for the child to endure. Can you think of ways that you as a member of the community contribute to that? Better yet, can you recognize the pattern AND intervene a change? Can YOU lend a hand to your neighbor? Can you take the initiative to step up to the communal responsibility and take a stand? Can you sign up to be a Mentor or a Big Brother/Big Sister? Can YOU offer some tools to your neighbor of positivity? Yes you can, it's effortless and it goes a long way!
See a Child today, Hug a Child today, Love a Child today!!!

Disturbing Situations...

When you think of the topic "Child Abuse" often times your mind almost exclusively goes to a small person who is defenseless and cannot help themselves. Oh how WRONG you are. Child Abuse starts in the womb, smoking, drinking, drugs, lack of nutrition, lack of medical care. Then there's the adolescent years where the teenagers are going through a very emotional and unstable period and are expected to carry themselves according to their appearance. Sometimes these children dont even look their age and are treated with such maliciousness it is an unbearable thought. Take a look at some of the stories that I linked you to on this website, brace yourself, the stories are graphic AND true and sometimes you need a graphic wake up call to enable the help that you as a community have to offer. Can you hold my hand in the struggle to put focus back on the children? I wanna hold your hand and help lead you to a different way of thinking and believing. 'And a Child Should Lead the Way.....'

3.25.2005

Help Kids

In a tireless effort to fight an uphill battle of improving my community and it's disparities, I still wipe the sweat from my brow with a smile and an optimistic way of thinking/living. I do believe that the children SHOULD BE the focus of each and EVERY community, and the focus SHOULD BE the tools WE provide to them and MAINTAINING them with a POSITIVE outlook. The way of life should be 'In Unity, Moving Forward for the Betterment of Mankind with the help of my Friend, Sister, Brother, Neighbor' is how I think we should finetune our community's way of thinking.
The commitment that I personally make to the community when I leave my house is to not judge the children, but to understand and help the children gain self-esteem. I initiate a wave, a smile. I NEVER turn away hugs. I always answer the questions if I can and if I can't, I take the time to point them in the right direction. I've NEVER let a child walk out of a store empty handed IF it is in my control (often times i've downsized my shopping), and I don't cuss at other people's kids. I agree that not all children are the most pleasant to encounter, BUT, that child did not get this way by birth.
It is the communities responsibility to nurture the children and not to judge and hurt them. For every action there is a reaction, and I cant help but to think that, we as a community participate in the molding of that everyday. The way we look away when a child smiles because we're having a bad day and don't feel like being bothered. The way a child is turned away from the store because they are .29 cents short and you stand there while he walks out of the store sad. You pull out a $20 to but a pkg of cigarettes.
Where do you think children LEARN kind gestures like that from? You! If that child is not equipped with the tool of kindness, than in turn how can they be kind to you. For example, you're coming out of the grocery store and you tripped over the loose carpeting and your bags go EVERYWHERE at the same time 4 teenagers are coming in the same doorway. You truly need help. It takes you 20 minutes to get your act together, meanwhile your cursing under your breath about how those kids have no manners or no gesture of kindness to offer you. Instilling this behavior in the children is called 'Hometraining'.
The community is our childen's home. That's where they grow up and learn their interaction skills is with the community. If something just clicked for you than that means you have a conscience and a sense of decency for the children. If nothing made sense, I will keep you in my prayers! Peace!

I'll Finally Fly Away...

One Day I Will Die,
And I Will Be Free and
I'll Finally Fly Away.

One Day You Will Reach,
I Will Not Be There and
I'll Finally Fly Away.

One Day You Will Speak,
I Will Always Hear You and
I'll Finally Fly Away.

One Day You Will Cry,
As My Memories Stream By and
I'll Finally Fly Away.

One Day You Will Laugh,
With You I Still Laugh, BUT,
I Finally Had To Fly Away!

A Voice from the Little Ones

Here's another spot on this blogsite I had but I couldnt figure out my password. The information is still very relevant and there are numerous links.

3.24.2005

Men Need Help in the Quest .......

....for raising their children. When the community cares for its children and a travesty such as abuse prevails, we as the community are left wondering "what ever happened to the child/ren?
When the case of the abuse is provoked or carried out by the Mother(in one of the addresses you will find that statistics stated that 94% of the abusers/perpetrators are women), it is the Mother that gets the focus and the attention. And many a time the child is either shuffled around through the system (subjected to the chance of more abuse) or raised by the Mothers side of the family, often being reunited with the child. While the question of 'what happened to the child' is being focused on , it is often lingering, "Well, where's the Dad?" Meanwhile, the Dad is on the other end pulling out his hair wondering "where is MY justice, and where are MY resources for help?"
There are far more resources for women and the reunification of the family where the Mother is concerned than that of Men. On a Google search 3,980,000 hits came up for resources for women who are abusers. When I did the same search for Men abusers, I came up with 380,000! How insulting to think that the standards surrounding the topic are that low. How dare the community deem that acceptable.

** I added these links in an effort to support any male member of any community
who is willing to put forth the efforts in 'nurturing the seed that you have sown.' My hats off to the REAL MEN in our community and the outstanding things that they endure everyday in the 'watering of their seed.'

  • Forum

  • Men's Issues

  • Action

  • Minority

  • Law Articles

  • **THIS ONE FIGURES!
  • Bush Interested?
  • An Adult Survivor...

  • Amber Alert
  • Children Are Worth Saving
  • Safe Child Homepage
  • Child Pornography as declared by Congress
  • Reporting Child Porn
  • Infantcide
  • Link to Infantcide
  • People who Kill
  • Serial Killers
  • Notorious Murderer
  • Famous Killer
  • Minnesota Help Links
  • Alcohols Role in Abuse
  • Voices of the Whisperer
  • Minneapolis Child Protection
  • Justice for Children
  • Parent Article
  • Minnesota Demographics
  • Minnesota statute on Child Abuse


  • I hope that some of these links are most helpful to your inquiries on child abuse. The saddest thing that I would like to relay to you is that if you do a google search on plain and simple child abuse, 17+ million searches prevail and even more disturbing is that if you do a Minnesota search 1,390,000 articles of focus come up. That means that more than 7 1/2 % of the abuse is focused on Minnesota.


    Childhelp USA National Child Abuse Hotline:
    1-800-4-A-CHILD
    (1-800-422-4453)
    TDD: 1-800-2-A-CHILD

    Child Abuse Is A Community Problem

    Cathy’s Story

    — a composite based on actual occurrences —

    Cathy, age 7, tells her teacher that she doesn’t want to go home today. When questioned, she discloses that her mommy’s boyfriend “does things to her and touches her in strange places.” She didn’t tell her mother because she was afraid she’d be mad and the boyfriend told her no one would believe her anyway.

    This simple declaration to a trusted adult is only the first step in a frightening journey for Cathy. She may yet have to tell her story to 7 more professionals in several institutions and offices throughout Nassau County.

    Nassau County’s Multidisciplinary Team has done wonders to improve case coordination and service delivery for Cathy and other child victims, but still children must go through too many traumatic interviews in too many locations. The Child Advocacy Center will minimize the number of interviews and will provide a safe child-friendly, warm setting where children can tell their story and be evaluated by all the professionals involved.


    CHILD ABUSE IS A COMMUNITY PROBLEM!!!!!

    Only the combined wisdom, knowledge, advocacy, and support of public agencies and private citizens will result in the most effective response possible

    What's Good About Anger????

    *Safeguarding children and young people
    "The Child Abuse Investigation Command, with a total of 468 police officers and 180 police staff, is probably the largest unit of its kind anywhere in the world, with a reputation second to none. Thanks to the efforts of a highly skilled, professional and dedicated workforce, a high quality of service is provided to vulnerable victims of abuse, both in terms of the investigation of reported crime and proactive operations against predatory pedophiles. Our aim is to make London a safer place for children and young people"

    Commander David Armond
    Head of Child Abuse Investigation Command

    *Children are vulnerable members of society and the MPS is committed to safeguarding children and young people in London against serious crime. Child abuse encompasses all types of ill treatment of children, including neglect, physical abuse, sexual and emotional abuse, as well as cases where the standard of care does not reach reasonable expectations.

    *In addition to the above, the Child Abuse Investigation Command focus on:
    *Improving investigation techniques surrounding computer-related crime involving children;
    *Preventing unsuitable people working with children;
    *Developing intelligence on predatory pedophiles and high-risk sex offenders;
    *Identifying migrant children at risk of exploitation.

    *The Child Abuse Investigation Command has carried out work on 28 child abuse prevention and reduction initiatives across London, and received wide acclaim from other partner agencies for their groundbreaking ideas on preventing child prostitution and shaken baby investigations.

    It is worth noting that:
    *Some 90,000 children a year come to the notice of police Child Abuse Investigation Units;
    *The Child Abuse Investigation Command investigates over 15,000 allegations of crime against children each year;
    *Approximately 26,500 children a year are taken into police protection ;
    *On average 21 children die each year as victims of serious crime and, of these, eight are murdered by family members

    *Safeguarding children and young people
    Class 'A' drugs
    Dismantling organized criminal networks and seizing their assets
    Gun-enabled crime
    Investigation and prevention of homicide
    organized crime in distinct communities

    *We need to know about any children that are victims of serious crime - so tell us what is going on in your community.
    *Call your neighborhood's police precinct or if you are unsure of the number call 911!

    And on the seventh day He rested......

    More insight and informational slideshow on child abuse!

    Stop Picking On Me

    Did you know that 1 out of every 3 children experiences some form of abuse in their home in their childhood at one point and time? Did you know that even indirect abuse is almost as abusive as direct abuse? Did you know that the scars left behind on the interior are about as extreme as the scars left on the outside? Did you know that something as simple as calling a child out of their name on just ONE occasion is just as abusive as balling up your fists and punching them in the face? Did you know that it is just as ridiculing & humiliating to be screamed at than it is to be slapped across the face? DId you know that this is whats on the inside of 1 out of every 3 little faces that you look at every day? Can you guess what face it is? In the course of one day, look at every tiny face you see and try to distinguish an abused child if you can? It is not hard to read and all the teel tale signs are there. Click on this site to learn more about some statistics and information!

    Before you raise your hand,... think twice about this....

    If even for a moment you could stop and wear my shoes. If only you could think for a moment, "how it feels to be me." If only you could think the way a child thinks. Like me, my worries are sidewalk chalk, homework (my teachers a real meanie), making it to the bathroom first thing in the morning (cuz my brother is a hot water hog), and making sure my little sister doesnt get MY favorite sweater (its her favorite too!) Now that I got a whoopin and my nose just stopped bleeding I have a new set of thoughts, like...I hope I didnt get blood on my clothes(my mom will kill me), Can she still hear me cry (i'll get it again if shr does) and what was it i did so I dont do it again! Think about that the next time you expect me to make rational, adult like and mature decisions. How am I supposed to cope, I am a kid?!?!?!?

    3.22.2005

    OOOUCH!!! That Hurts!

    If you are looking for information on the subject or want to clarify exactly what is child abuse than your link is right here!

    And if only you knew....

    There are alot of people that take the subject of child abuse very seriously. I would have to say that regardless of a persons background, we, as a people, in unison agree that abuse is not fair or acceptable. No matter what walk of life you come from and no matter what language we speak, we all speak the same language of the love of children.

    Raise your Hand To Me and Pay!!!

    And If you think this is acceptable behavior you have another thing coming. For far too long you have gotten away with this and I think its about time that this stopped. Have you ever stopped to think exactly what it is you are doing to me? I bet you don't even care that you are causing damage that is irreparable and life-lasting for me. What's the matter, my words too extreme for you? Well your actions are too extreme for me! How do you like that?!?!?!